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M. F. , Editor
Vol. 1, Issue 2

DEMAND FOR ASSASINS RISING: CAREER PROSPECTS GOOD!

Irreconcilable differences with that political rival? Why bother with negotiations, or that tired old habit of girding up a few hundred men and marching them into the field? At least, that seems to be the trend throughout the land, as someone (or, more likely, a lot of someones) has been hiring assassins by the bundle. Many of the leaders of the vast army from the plains of Ranna, currently marching on Nitlas (see story below) have gone missing, and the rumour around the camp is that enemies have been launching a pre-emptive strike against the leadership. Similarly, several bureaucrats in the Papacy are missing, and while some of them are undoubtedly casualties of the continued fighting around Telkari, others are rumoured to have fallen to hidden blades. Authorities everywhere curse the use of these scurrilous techniques as dastardly and underhanded, but they continue nonetheless.

The Millenialist would like to remind any aspiring professionals in the assassination field that Millenialist reporters are restricted by editorial policy for searching into who was responsible for any given assassination, by terms of our insurance agreements.

BARBARIANS AT THE GATE

Angry tribesmen from Ranna are infuriated by reports that an agent provocateur, perhaps even the crown prince, gave false information to the plains people resulting in an attack on the embattled Papacy. In retaliation, the Papacy seems to be allowing free passage to Ranna armies wishing to crush Nitlas, an attack that was moments away as we went to press.

EARTHQUAKE, UPHEAVAL AND OTHER FUN

Throughout the land, weather has been unpredictable and the ground just doesn't seem to be able to stay down! Almost every city has been hit by mild to middling earthquakes recently, which seem to be gaining in strength. No deaths have been blamed on the ground pounding, but several people in New Taeorn were treated for bruises when Zak's House of Beans collapsed.

PHIL'S MILLIONS MAKE GREED GOOD, REAP HARVEST ON BLOODY FIELDS

While it was undoubtedly not what Phil the Founder hoped for when he set up the School of Commerce in Nitlas, the waves of bloody assassinations that have shook our fair nations has been good for his recent graduates. The empty stalls of merchants too slow to outrun our bloody instability have provided a providential number of empty seats for the bums of his students. Still, there's no doubting that the school turns out first-rate merchants, proud additions to the Silver Coins and Ten Stars. Said one ex-pupil, "Before I came in, I was unable to count the gold in my pocket. Now, no one can count the gold in my bank.

NEW TAEORN COUNCIL WORSE THAN THE LAST, SAYS CITIZENS

Various unsatisfied citizens have taken to accusing the new council in Taeorn of accepting bribes, showing favoritism, and getting the police to cover up wine-soaked orgied. "They treat this city like their own private playpen, like little kids, they are," said one disgruntled lady, on condition of anonymity. However, after dedicated research, crack Millenialist reporters have been unable to bribe one member of the Council, and we were unable to prove the existence of any scandalous debauchery. Perhaps the Citizens of New Taeorn have been reading a little too much of the Dragon?

LOST AND FOUND

As a service to our readers, the Millenialist prints the following:

FOUND: One diary, full of strange references to historical figures, offered to anyone for right reward, contact Gray Mark at Inn of Falling Candle, N.T.; LOST: Silver ring, inscription on inside "to my love Gwyendolen", contact Lady G. A'peylion, N.T.; LOST: Golden Mask, great personal value, return to Taylor c/o Academy of Recovery.

Brought to you by:

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UNHOLY TIME FOR PAPACY

Is the Pope dead? Long live the Pope! This and other confusion confronted citizens after a disturbancein the capital, where the God Emperor has not been seen for some time. Two men, a green-haired fellow and a town guard, were seen entering the capital of Paltrovia, and after a tremendous but somewhat vaguely-reported clash, neither were seen to have left. Several gifted have now claimed the God Emperor is dead, but no officials from the Papacy have commented.

This comes against a backdrop of bad news for the Holy Kingdom, as it has become clear that the rebel army won its initial engagement. However, all is not as sanguine as it seems for the anti-Papists. "You have to consider that the Papacy hasn't really mustered its forces yet," said military/political strategist Zefram Kolhn. "The rebels had a good first showing, but they won't be able to get Nitlas to distract their enemy again. Against a fully-active Papacy and with weakened allies... well, the smart money's on the guys in the long robes."

EDITORIAL: THE RULE OF LAW

The Force-Touched, having been freed from the rules of natural law, seem to be willing to subvert social law to their every whim. Does one really believe that the plagues afflicting the land are not the result of some scheming, powerful madman who cares only for himself? Does anyone think that the rebels (undoubtedly led by the Force-Touched) in the Papacy give a damn about the common people, left homeless and barren after their great clash? No. Given the power that the Magister used to help us all, the Force Touched have played a game with only one rule: "Me."

No more! It is time to hold those with the power responsible for its use. The Force-Touched should stop these wars, halt these earthquakes, and help their mundane cousins survive these times. That role was good enough for the Magister: it should be good enough for his followers.

-M. F.